Why does loving yourself often times feel like a task or something you have to force yourself to do? Do you notice that you sacrifice your time and energy without question for others in your life, but somehow find it difficult to make time for yourself, or to say something nice to yourself?
You’re not alone.
Your relationship with yourself is the one relationship that will always be constant in your life, no matter what. It is also the one relationship most people spend the least amount of time nurturing and thinking about.
Let’s take a minute to evaluate your relationship with you:
- What are the top 3 words that come to mind when you think about yourself?
- When you have free time do you spend it doing something to better/pamper yourself?
- When you look in the mirror is your first thought one of kindness and admiration or more disappointment and critique?
Is the overall energy and result of your answers positive and loving, or judgmental and demeaning?
Some of the most common words that come to ones mind when they think of themselves are, exhausted, unloved, invisible, lonely, ugly, overweight, unfulfilled, lost, aggressive, not enough etc.
These negative self-beliefs didn’t just appear one day. They started at a very young age and have been growing ever since. They are fed by others opinions and by the shear lack of self-belief and self-love. It is common to try and search for self-meaning, and self-purpose in outside circumstances and people. You have most likely experienced this in some way at some time in your life. Hoping that the perfect relationship would make you happy, or the new job position would bring you purpose, or moving to a new city would mean a new start, but at the end of the journey you realize, you are right where you started.
If the source of your purpose and happiness is coming from someone or something else, you are a victim to your circumstances and you are not in control of your life or your happiness, and will always struggle to truly feel loved or fulfilled.
So what do you do?
“Love yourself,” sounds so easy and doable right? But what exactly does that mean, to love oneself? Loving yourself can look like many things, and be done in many ways, but to sum it up, it is to believe you are worth it. Worth loving, worth getting a massage, worth having that new job, worth that mani/pedi, worth being treated right, worth success, worth moving to a new city, worth it all.
Let me clarify this, when YOU believe that you are worth it, then your worth is no longer affected by whether or not you get the job, relationship, mani/pedi, raise, etc. At this point you are no longer a victim to the circumstances that are happening around you, because you know that you are worth having it all.
How exciting is that?! To be free from the roller coaster of ups and downs, and to know that no matter what, you have the control to make your life whatever you want it to be.
Where to begin
To believe you are worth having it all, you have to start loving and accepting yourself just as you are. One of the most powerful ways to do this is thru affirmations. This is a way to start speaking to yourself like you would someone you love and admire.
I have put together a resource to help better explain affirmations and help you get started with changing the way you love yourself and start living your life BIG, which is what you deserve. Check out my FREE downloadable ‘Affirmations-of-Self-Love‘ lesson and get started today, because you are worth having it all.